The Problem With The Law Of Attraction

Before the year is over, I know what its central idea will be for me. I've had to learn many lessons but there was one that I embraced more than others: my thoughts make a difference. You won't hear me say it very much outside of this blog but it's been a tough year. It started traumatizing and I felt like my positive attitude towards life was under attack. And as soon as I thought that, more bad things happened. Sounds familiar, doesn't it? It's the basis of the saying "evil travels in twos". It's easy: if you think positively, positive things happen. When you feel the world is coming to get you, it will get you eventually. These simple truths are not new to anyone, yet I found it super, super hard to execute what people simply call the law of attraction. And outside of the reality of keeping a positive mind when things simply are not going well, I have found one thing especially wrong with it: pressure.

When you surround yourself with THIS, love comes naturally!

The law of attraction says that what you think of, you attract. I know this law isn't a lie. I got my last job this way, last week's interview and someone to text me recently. Much bigger than that, the last person who loved me only did so because he met me when my mind was pure, I was exuding love and, therefore, attracted him into my life, cheesily speaking. My best friends were the results of myself making a conscious effort to practice kindness, be good to everyone and really care, so life gave me kind, good people, one of them literally called Jesus as if his personality wasn't enough to make him feel like a blessing. I was receiving signs that things were the results of my thinking in bold letters and I continued with the response to them the law of attraction suggested: gratitude.

With other things, it wasn't that easy. I would say the beginning of the mind change that brought me 2018, all of it, was returning from my trip to New York over NYE where I had been trying to come to terms with what had happened in the summer of 2017. Some bad experiences had not yet caught up with me, but I was waiting for my mind to get the memo and not bury my feelings about these events in a pile of distractions. Because that is exactly what I did. I spent a large amount of time with someone I know now wasn't very good for me and also attracted the opposite of goodness. But of course, when you only spent time with someone because you need distraction, although subconsciously, and that person doesn't really appreciate you and makes you feel more insecure, the law of attraction is already at work; it's giving you more of what you actually didn't want: insecurity, connections completely devoid of a human or kind spirit and continuous burying of feelings.

As a result, I wanted to change the thoughts. According to all the books, it only takes a moment to change the attitude and then, there you go, all your heart's desires are there on a silver platter. With my move to London, all that seemed possible. I was positive, getting responses from jobs, hung out with the people I really love and who love me back and I stopped drinking, went running almost every day and meditated myself to bliss. It was working. It brought me joy and I knew that things would be ok, for the first time in a while. I was starting to feel better after this dreadful year because I had space from the experiences. Meditation and gratitude showed me that deep inside, I am happy although circumstances aren't golden.

Of course, positivity gets a down day. While I was trying to become a kinder person, I realized just how much I cared about some people. And I saw they were not well. My positivity couldn't shake it. It's human, you'd think, but I started to freak out. Within minutes I was anxious, felt helpless and was scared that I wouldn't be able to do anything about it. Which, of course, would only bring exactly this into my life, if the law of attraction does work. I worried and so that frequency changed again. I worried more because I felt the pressure that I, myself, was manifesting negative things into my life. The pressure made me more miserable, feeling the urge to change my thinking now and not a minute later. The very thing I believe in making my life better was making me feel bad about when I was just a tad too human to just be positive all the time. So I started to ask myself: why is positivity harder than negativity?

When something bad happens, it's easy to be sad. When good things happen, people tend to take them for granted. I suppose it's natural, having a survival instinct and responding to danger more drastically than safety. This outline for life has made bad times or just a tiny negative thought more complicated though. As soon as negativity creeps up now, I feel I need to contain my brain which I cannot, at least not yet. It seems like I force myself to be positive when I should just give some space to negativity. And then suddenly it hit me: that's exactly what I'm supposed to do. I shall not give negativity room. Yes, it's not just about me and I cannot make people better but I can try to eliminate bad feelings. For everyone. When I think positive, I choose to believe it is powerful. Not just for me. For others, too. Maybe even the world. So yes, bury the negativity. Do not give it space. It doesn't deserve it.

That, however, does take practice. I guess the law of attraction does not just work express.