Saturday, December 13, 2014

Thoughts on age difference part III

Once again, I have found myself in a relationship with a much younger guy. The youngest before him was 39 months younger than me. I had every intention to never break that record. Little did I know that my current boyfriend is in fact 39 months and two weeks younger than me. People have stopped believing me when I say I am actually not looking to be with youngsters all the time. And in my defence, I thought my current lover was two years older than he is until two weeks ago but I will have to admit this has undeniably become a thing now. How much I finally wanted to be with someone age worthy and still I end up with the children. At the same time, the current toyboy owns land and is self-employed which, besides academic achievement, beats my achievements by quite a bit. So what is age?

I feel no day older than 23 despite me turning 26 this January. Three years ago I dated someone the same age as my boyfriend, only that back then I was 23 myself. I haven't changed so why would it be worse to date someone of that age now? Because I'm so mature? Obviously, I do not care. I have found this entire age thing to be totally irrelevant. Yes, I'm slightly more interested in someone if he's either younger or way too old for me but only because I like to be unconventional. I have just met way too many exceptions to the age rule. I know many people older than me that are more ridiculous than my baby lover. At the same time, I'm not ahead of my age or even age appropriate so why would it even matter? Jennifer Lawrence AMD Kate Upton are way younger than me, for God's sake, and I'd still have an epic time with them if I ever partied with them.

Especially since leaving university my age range for friends and partners has extended heavily. These days I hang out with 20 year-olds just as much as 40 year-olds. In fact, my age range in my circle is 28 years. While most of my friends would be considered my age I am close friends with people much younger and older, too, and we don't live in different worlds. I even find myself going to raves with my friend who recently turned 40 who is a full generation older than my boyfriend, yet my boy is the one rather staying in watching a movie and smoking a cigar. Clearly age rules are truly loose in my generation. And quite visibly beyond my own.

For me it has become a firm of tolerance speaking to people not my own age. I used to age-discriminate big time. As I learn to approach people from different backgrounds better growing up I also learn how to forget about age. When is the last time I didn't befriend someone because he was a hippie, or a punk, or a geek? That's right, freaking never. The opposite applies actually: the more different people are the more I am attracted to them. It's no different with age. People outside of my own generation are more interesting. My baby boyfriend lives in a completely different world due to these three years. Sooner or later that won't be the case anymore but for now I'm shocked about the absence of NSync in his life. Age just doesn't matter at all at my age. We're all kinda lost around 20, not shaped to perfection at all and the younger we are the more we have to discover.  Some more than others. And it looks like it's what we've seen so far that determines who we are, and not the number.

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